Shaquille O’Neal, Pedo Hunter

A couple weeks ago Vanity Fair released a interview with Shaquille O’Neal, star NBA player, household name and terrifying giant. These days Shaq is best known for having his own TV show in which he flies around the world kicking ass and for posting bizarre shit on his Twitter feed.

This interview made Shaq out to be even weirder, if that’s possible. He goes from talking about challenging Justin Bieber to a singing contest to discussing his latest job: pretending to be a little girl online.

What’s your arrest catchphrase?

My catchphrase? Like a motto?

What do you say when you’re roughing up a perp? “On the floor, dirtbag!” “Book ‘em, Danno!” That kind of thing.

Well, uh. (Long pause.) My job is to be a little girl.

Come again?

I play a little girl on the Internet. So whatever name I’m going by, that will probably be my catchphrase. If I’m Tanya, then it’ll be something like, “Tanya says hello.” And they’ll be like, “Tanya who?” And I’ll say, “You don’t know no Tanya, huh? I’m Tanya. Let’s go.” And that’s when the cuffs get slapped on you.

You don’t have to be a pedophile to find this terrifying.

[via The Superficial]